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Silenced Disputes and A Little Peace

by Summer Rae (follow)
Motherhood (45)     
Silenced Disputes

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So now there's a clear plastic sticky tape on my mouth,
there's string wrapped around my fingers,
but I want to cry and scream like singers.

There's things in life more important.
Sometimes we shouldn't share.
Even though I teach my boys to play together,
though at times there's more important things and you must take care,
to listen and hold on to your tongue.
It's sunny and hot outside
but inside its stormy weather.

One week seems fine and happy,
the next things are quiet and snappy.
I'm in love but things are hard.
They say the beginning of love is an amazing honey moon,
wrapped up in your beautiful felt, silk, glittering cocoon.

They say relationships and families are hard work,
that you have to show up and put in extra effort.
Some people's lives look so cruisey,
So easy,
So happy,
So breezy.
So cheeky and funny.
Some relationships and families seem to have it all beautiful and sunny.



Is it true that things are as hard as they can be with us?
We have fun even though he can cuss!
Some people don't like their private life out in the open,
is it shame or the unknown that is never spoken?

Can others share and show the hard times too?
Reassure me it's all okay and not always beautiful chimes with you?

Is it drums and smashing?
Is it yelling and cursing?
Is it sighs and silent treatment?
Is there a lot of disagreement?

I have clear tape on my mouth,
I have strings knotted around my finger,
But my heart is a strong, stubborn singer.
I cannot be shushed,
as I have a passion.
It's writing, art, dance and fashion.
People may roll their eyes,
Some, maybe most, donít like my style.
But itís not for them, itís for me and my cries.

I have storms inside,
I have dancing inside,
I have parties inside,
I have smiles and all types of highs.

I need to reach for the skies,
Itís been too long this control on me and criticise
You may enjoy reading,
But itís not for you,
Itís for me.

Looking for my other shoe,
My slipper, the glass one.
Has it smashed?
Or is it just snug hidden in moss and long grass?
Waiting for support,
A gentle caress,
Some singing, dancing, painting?
Will it come out and play?
Will it come out and complete me and my Cinderella day?

So if you have babies, a family, a partner and things arenít so perfect,
Please share,
And let me know you care.
No need to compare,
Just hold out your arms
For a warm embrace,
And show other woman and men
Perfectionism is not the case.

Relationships are work,
Families are work,
But enjoy the small things
And spread your wings.
No need to be Queens or Kings.




A Little Peace

Feeling calmer now.
Sometimes writing to friends and family really helps.
Sometimes writing out thoughts and options does too,
Sometimes talking directly and openly to the person helps you.
But somethings are best unsaid,
Saved for writing in your private personal journal
Or to keep in your head.
To vent, to curse, to say things or think things you normally
Wouldnít,
Shouldnít,
Couldnít,
Somehow things came into perspective,
Like youíre your own detective,
Sifting through your issues and options.

But sometimes a really good sleep is just the best!
To wake up from an awesome rest.

So many people divorce,
So many people separate,
So many people make rash decisions,
And sometimes itís from the media, the films, the fantasies, Instagram and FacebookÖ

Sometimes you need to step back,
Sleep in,
Eat well,
Exercise is great and healthy but relaxing from time to time is important as well.

Today Iíve had an amazing busy day with my toddlers,
We have had breaky, snacks, lunch,
We have drawn with textas,
Watched some telly and played with lego and battery operated toys.
Weíve drawn on the pavers with big thick chalk and baby small chalk.



Weíve had water play, a hose each.
Sun cream, hats and bare feet.
Weíve had a big bath container, kicked, blown bubbles and splashed.

Thereís been tears and tantrums of course,
But nothing too intense.
No cursing, no anxious scares,
Just a family of four doing washing and playing on a Sunday unawares,
These days bring you back to basics.
Our eldest and youngest even in undies.
Some wee, some poo,
Some snot, conjunctivitis, coughs and a molar coming through.

My man off to uni to study and my babies sleeping.
Me sitting in the garden, quiet and writing.
Sounds of crows, birds, cars, a few neighbours here and there.
The dogs just hangin without a care.

Iím feeling good, Iím feeling better,
Iím taking things slow and enjoying the small things.
Itís little days and moments of paradise,
With nice clothes, jewels, funky hair,
A little music,
And a little down time,
That make me feel at peace.
Make me feel that maybe everything
Will be alright,
In this new town,
Night after night.

So smile and know,
That right now Iím happy,
Iím Summer Rae,
And Iíll say whatever I want to say,
So I hope you have a brilliant day ;)

ĎThe past is gone,
The future isnít here
The now is a gift
Thatís why itís called the present.'

Breathe in, breathe out,
Feel the breeze caress your shoulders,
Soak up some rays
And get ready soon for some more plays :)

#Motherhood
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