In life there are always hard times. There are always challenges. When you are young and small, your challenges are big and difficult and as you age, you look back and think those challenges weren't so hard.
Things seem hard before you overcome them. Learning to walk. Learning to talk. Learning your times tables. Writing an essay. Winning a netball game. Dealing with a broken heart after a two week relationship. Learning to drive.
I'm 30 and I think the things I'm dealing with are hard, but I now look back and realise that everything was a challenge. However, once accomplished, you forget, you celebrate, you enjoy and you move forward.
Right now we need to find a house to live in for my partner, my two and a half year old and one year old sons and two large dogs. We need to get new jobs. Move out of this house in 4 weeks for the new owners to move in and start a new life in a new town. This seems stressful and builds anxiety because we just lost our first application for a house to other tenants.
I want to take a moment to be grateful now.
I'm grateful we don't have colds or the flu. We have great families and recently laughed a lot playing silly games. We had a really yummy dinner and lunch. My sons are beautiful, funny, loving, special boys. My partner is beautiful and loving. It's beautiful and green here. It was fun swimming in the river and so lovely going on a boat ride with just my man and I. Romantic, beautiful, relaxing and tranquil. My partner is learning a lot and doing well at university. I'm very employable and have many skills. We will be able to go to the beach more soon (hopefully).
I like to try and be "faithful". It is nice to think someone is looking out for you and that everything happens for a reason and what is meant to be will be.
I like to try and be excited for a beautiful homely home and imagine a great job, great new friends, settling down and having a smooth year ahead.
We have had many bumps in our road the past three years. Maybe some bumps haven't been as big as others. Maybe sometimes we haven't made the best decisions. But we are obviously still learning. We feel like we've done everything backwards. We've been told to have more time together, just the two of us. We've been told to make ourselves happy and fill our own cups and look after ourselves.
I wish I could pray and know that everything was all going to fall into place just as it should. But I just have to have a little faith. And try our hardest to make all of the right decisions.
I know I'll look back in a while and this next month won't look so bad or hard at all. It will be done and sorted and we will have new challenges.
I want to make our dreams come true. They say hard work makes that happen. Good things come to those who work hard. If you want things to change then you must make changes for it to happen.
I have many goals for the year. But I'm just focusing on the now first up.
I was training for a half marathon a few years ago. I had a "few" drinks on a Friday night and then decided to go for my Long Beach run on the Saturday morning to "sweat out" or "run off" the alcohol and calories. I took my chocolate Labrador with me and headed off down 7 mile beach, listening to my tunes, hearing my nike app click over the kms. I pushed myself a little further, a little further and reached the end of the beach. I had no water and my mouth was dry. As I ran back my jaw started cramping, my legs started cramping. I was so thirsty. I ran into the trees hoping to find a tap to drink from.
Nothing. I had about 4Kms to get home and each step was slow and painful. My lab even drank some salt water. I just told myself "One step at a time. One step at a time and you will be closer to home." I vowed never to become so dehydrated again. To always have water for long distances. Every step I couldn't wait to be home. I told myself this physical challenge will be one to remember. One lesson to be learned. I knew it was a metaphor for so many struggles in life and that I just needed to keep my chin up, little by little I would be closer to reaching my goal as long as I kept putting one foot in front of the other.
So this year coming, not only am I moving forward one step at a time with my goals and visions, hoping and praying for everything to work out for us, but I will be prepared and determined to be a better me. I will always try to be faithful, positive, strong, fun, determined, helpful, ethical and healthier - for me and for my boys (all three of them).
Here's to a smooth new year, okay, with a few bumps here and there naturally, but here's to dealing with the challenges we face with poise, grace and ease. You can only hope and try hey.
And here's to being grateful and enjoying the small things when life seems tough.